Look, here’s the deal. We only have 48 hours left to push Scott “Stop Calling Me Samwise Goddamit” Kurtz’s “PvP” comic strip to #1 in the Popularity Poll. This calls for extreme measures.
This calls for bribery.
So, in that spirit of enough frenetic mercantilism to make a Ferengi’s ears wiggle, we at LumCo are running a contest. All you need to do to win is vote HERE. Just click the damn link, it’s not rocket science. Then, send me an email filling in the blank below that you see when you successfully vote (not that I don’t TRUST you or anything…)
Thank you for your votes!
Your votes will be used for _________________________, usually published on Mondays.
You can vote as many times as you can think up weird-ass email addresses (for the love of God, DON’T use your real email, unless you actually like getting email telling you about NEW MARKETING OPPORTUNITIES!) and each vote you get puts you that much closer to winning our valuable prizes.
Did I mention prizes? Oh yes, we have prizes. Oh yes.
FIRST PLACE – THE NEW GAME “LEGACY OF KAIN: SOUL REAVER” by Eidos Interactive
This is not a joke. If you win, I will send you a copy of this new game. You are a vampire and you run around killing other vampires. I think. I never could get it to work on my funky sound card, and Eidos tech support was no help whatsoever, so instead I dedicate the $45 I spent on this game to a worthy cause – you.
Note: We do not guarantee that this game will work on YOUR computer, either. Includes CD, designer carboard CD case complete with worthless Eidos Demos CD, and instruction booklet with lots of cool drawings of vampires and demons and crap. Does not include box since I pitch those. I’ll pay postage. I will email you if you win to get your mailing address.
SECOND PLACE – WIN A DATE WITH DURGA!
She was a senior executive with AOL, she writes a hip gaming column, she runs the Companions program, and now she can be YOUR Companion for an evening of fun and frivolity in Austin, the Live Music Capital Of Greater South Central Texas! Hit the clubs and nightspots, tour the romantic OSI office complex, or just drive aimlessly on the freeway – it’s up to you.
Note: it is the winner’s responsibility to travel to Austin, contact Durga, befriend her, and convince her to go out with you on a date. We make no guarantees that Durga will in fact go out with you on a date, that Durga is not currently involved in a meaningful relationship already, or that Durga will not call the police and have you arrested for stalking. Mentioning my name or this contest is not recommended.
THIRD PLACE – GET A PERSONAL EMAIL FROM CALANDRYLL!
Second only to the Helpful Daikatana Monkey for service rendered to the gaming community, Calandryll is already a legend among the UO cognoscenti, and you can get a real authentic email from this actual person. This is something you will treasure for the rest of your life, assuming your hard drive does not crash and you do not upgrade your email program.
Note: it is the winner’s responsibility to email Calandryll and ask a question that requires some sort of response.
FOURTH PLACE – GET SLAIN BY CRIMINAL ELEMENT!
Silent, professional, and deadly. No dewds, these – if you are a lucky winner, you can recieve prompt and courteous service from these masters of UO PvP. Siege Perilous only, please.